AD30 V

AD30  V

Aroostook Dirty 30

Oh cool, you're a marathoner or badass ultra runner!
Sweeeeet, you've done a million obstacle course races, because you think you're one Tough Mudda Humpa, bub.

You've read the news stories, or maybe you saw a youtube video, or heard whispered in hushed tones within your running community about this crazy race up in northern Hicksville that you don't even have to pay for!

And now you're here, the "official" website of the world's worst 30 mile run.
You'll laugh. You'll cry. You'll quit. Our DNF rate is 50 percent for 4 years running.

This race is so bad, that it's damn near a miracle if you even make it to the start. Our DNS (did not start) rate is like, 90%, dude.

Now that we've really sold you…..

TO ENTER
Send a humorous handwritten letter(decorated), and a check for $30 to:
Kale Poland
10 Mitchell Place
Laconia, NH 03246
EVERYONE WHO TOES THE START LINE GETS A FULL REFUND.
If you are someone who just wanted to say that you signed up to sound sexy on Facebook, that's O.K. You're money will fund our Rock-n-rolla status at every club in town the night after the race. SO THANK YOU!

For questions, find our Facebook account AROOSTOOK DIRTY THIRTY or email kalepoland@yahoo.com




FINISHERS 2013
Lillian "The Terminator" Porteus
Stephen "Pepe Lepew" Assante
Amy "Split Chin" Poland

STILL CLEAN
-Michelle Roy was yanked from the bushes at mile 4
-Beau Taylor and Adam Murchison enjoyed each other's company after they were too pooched to go beyond mile 15

Wednesday, June 29, 2011

June 2011 Dirty Letter


I'm sitting here, looking at my list of Dirties for September 24...thinking, "hot damn, we've got to get this locked down".

As I scan the names, the 20ish people I see makes me smile and laugh. Memories of last year's event come to mind.
At one point, we thought we lost a competitor. Kyle Washington, the race's only male finisher, had stopped mid-race to get a McGriddle from McDonalds.

Or what about Barb, the only women's finisher jumping into the stream below Mojo, and going chest-deep?
Renee giving race officials the finger while riding the horse at Riverside...
Having only 2 people left, when the race was only 13.5 miles done.

And there are tons of unknowns. Who are some of these challengers and what do they bring to the start line?
AD30 is unique for many reasons, but number one is that it is like life. Unfair.

We're looking at who you are as a person, and exploiting you. If we don't know you, we're looking at your past race results, or your psyche file, which we stole. Maybe we've even stalked you around town for a 48 hour period.

You might have to do things other competitors don't. The distance will always be 30 miles+, but if you smart off to a TMB and have to drag a cement block on a string for a mile, that's your fault entirely. Accept responsibility.

A couple friendly reminders:
- 8 hours is the cutoff to go 30 miles. That's a 16 minute mile average. Remember there will be times that you will be at a full stop, getting hazed by Kate and the crew of TMBs. Feel like this is out of your range? Try it anyways. We love a higher mortality rate.
-Must show up to the start line in a wife-beater. If you want to add to the costume, style points might help.
-NO AID STATIONS. We don't give you water, food, or any of that stuff. Likewise, no one may have support, either. Meaning, no friends coming out on bikes to give you stuff.
-If you drop out, 10 miles from town, that's your issue to deal with. We don't give sympathy and certainly not rides, either.
-Headlight might be a good idea for the beginning. I remember it being dark for a good hour into the race last year.


If you could please send me either a Facebook message or email with confirmation, that would be great. We are less than 3 months out right now. If you can't make it, or are chickening out, also let me know.
Within the next month, the course will be all planned out. TMBs are being assembled as you read this.. like a swarm of angry bees waiting for a target.
Looking forward to watching you all push your pain tolerance to the max, and then some.

krp